1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,735 Previously on "Reginald the Vampire"... 2 00:00:01,809 --> 00:00:03,106 I can fix this, Reggie. 3 00:00:03,507 --> 00:00:04,941 I'm a motherfucking vampire. 4 00:00:04,952 --> 00:00:06,353 Being a fat vampire, 5 00:00:06,453 --> 00:00:07,754 that's gonna cause some problems 6 00:00:07,854 --> 00:00:09,056 within the vampire community. 7 00:00:09,156 --> 00:00:12,059 Reginald will die. I'll make sure of it. 8 00:00:12,070 --> 00:00:14,606 This is perfect. Literal perfection. 9 00:00:14,795 --> 00:00:16,563 I like you too, Reginald. 10 00:00:16,663 --> 00:00:19,232 Drink what you need. Make them forget you drank. 11 00:00:19,333 --> 00:00:20,734 Just glam yourself some dinner. 12 00:00:20,834 --> 00:00:22,436 Listen to me. 13 00:00:22,536 --> 00:00:25,138 You will take part in the Vampiric Ability 14 00:00:25,238 --> 00:00:26,940 and Potential Assessment, 15 00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:28,942 henceforth known as The Assessment. 16 00:00:29,042 --> 00:00:30,611 Ooh. 17 00:00:30,711 --> 00:00:32,045 Appreciate the save. 18 00:00:32,145 --> 00:00:34,014 You have amazing reflexes. 19 00:00:34,114 --> 00:00:35,491 How long have you been able to do that? 20 00:00:35,515 --> 00:00:37,150 Sort of been coming on for a while. 21 00:00:37,250 --> 00:00:39,219 I am Logan. 22 00:00:39,319 --> 00:00:43,323 Did you honestly think that you could kill me... 23 00:00:45,125 --> 00:00:46,360 I claim deaconship 24 00:00:46,460 --> 00:00:47,804 of the Council of the Americas henceforth. 25 00:00:47,828 --> 00:00:49,429 I'll just need time. 26 00:00:49,529 --> 00:00:52,666 Say I have a chance, and I'll wait forever. 27 00:00:52,766 --> 00:00:54,134 You're angels. 28 00:00:54,234 --> 00:00:56,770 You're emissaries of the Golden Divine. 29 00:00:56,870 --> 00:01:00,841 We are here to eradicate a grievous mistake we made. 30 00:01:01,008 --> 00:01:02,709 [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING] 31 00:01:02,809 --> 00:01:04,845 Welcome to the Slushy Shack. 32 00:01:05,012 --> 00:01:06,346 How may I help you? 33 00:01:06,446 --> 00:01:08,915 Oh, sorry, your card is declined. 34 00:01:09,016 --> 00:01:12,252 [DRAMATIC MUSICAL STING] 35 00:01:12,352 --> 00:01:15,656 Maybe some delicious snacks from our snack racks? 36 00:01:15,756 --> 00:01:18,425 Corn-based products guaranteed to suit every taste. 37 00:01:18,525 --> 00:01:20,193 Oh, hey. 38 00:01:20,294 --> 00:01:22,596 How about a slushy on the house? 39 00:01:22,696 --> 00:01:24,665 The card denied. 40 00:01:24,765 --> 00:01:27,034 Build you up and then they shut you down. 41 00:01:27,100 --> 00:01:28,540 But we can't let a Pineapple Surprise 42 00:01:28,602 --> 00:01:29,803 go to waste, now, can we? 43 00:01:29,903 --> 00:01:31,905 - Mm-mm. - It's his favorite. 44 00:01:32,039 --> 00:01:33,407 Pineapple? 45 00:01:33,507 --> 00:01:35,342 Christopher Columbus, genocidal bad guy 46 00:01:35,442 --> 00:01:37,210 with his own federal holiday... 47 00:01:37,311 --> 00:01:39,379 Uh, his crew named it a pineapple 48 00:01:39,479 --> 00:01:41,648 because they thought that it looked like a pine cone. 49 00:01:41,748 --> 00:01:43,083 True story. 50 00:01:43,183 --> 00:01:46,053 It's for... consumption? 51 00:01:46,119 --> 00:01:47,654 - Try it. - You'll like it. 52 00:01:47,754 --> 00:01:50,123 It's my favorite. 53 00:01:50,223 --> 00:01:53,126 [SOFT MUSIC] 54 00:01:53,226 --> 00:02:00,233 ♪ ♪ 55 00:02:01,301 --> 00:02:02,903 This is perfection. 56 00:02:05,072 --> 00:02:07,407 BOTH: Another satisfied customer. 57 00:02:07,507 --> 00:02:08,775 [BOTH LAUGH] 58 00:02:08,875 --> 00:02:10,477 - Oh. - Oh. 59 00:02:10,577 --> 00:02:13,447 [QUIRKY MUSIC] 60 00:02:13,458 --> 00:02:14,503 ♪ ♪ 61 00:02:14,514 --> 00:02:16,016 [KNOCKS] 62 00:02:16,049 --> 00:02:19,486 ♪ ♪ 63 00:02:19,586 --> 00:02:21,464 You're probably wondering how I spent the night. 64 00:02:21,488 --> 00:02:23,657 Uh, I'm gonna go with reading. 65 00:02:23,757 --> 00:02:24,891 Oh, yes. 66 00:02:25,025 --> 00:02:27,260 Reading, processing, 67 00:02:27,361 --> 00:02:31,465 filling my head with exactly what we need. 68 00:02:31,565 --> 00:02:32,633 Socrates. 69 00:02:32,733 --> 00:02:37,137 Founder of Western philosophy, so big props. 70 00:02:37,237 --> 00:02:40,040 Cicero. Politician to the max. 71 00:02:40,140 --> 00:02:42,075 So cool, they cut off his head. 72 00:02:42,175 --> 00:02:44,444 And, of course, Machiavelli, 73 00:02:44,544 --> 00:02:46,680 father of modern political philosophy 74 00:02:46,780 --> 00:02:48,715 and all-around Sneaky Pete. 75 00:02:51,351 --> 00:02:54,087 "Ten Steps To Build A Love That Lasts," Brent T. Jason. 76 00:02:54,187 --> 00:02:55,989 Oh, that's a different project altogether. 77 00:02:56,056 --> 00:02:58,825 I'd much rather not talk about this now. 78 00:02:58,992 --> 00:03:00,227 Okay. 79 00:03:00,327 --> 00:03:01,567 Well, what exactly is it we need 80 00:03:01,662 --> 00:03:05,465 that filled your head? 81 00:03:05,565 --> 00:03:08,201 It's been almost a month since my assessment. 82 00:03:08,302 --> 00:03:12,005 Don't you think it's about time, as deacon, 83 00:03:12,039 --> 00:03:13,840 for you to sit on your throne? 84 00:03:14,007 --> 00:03:15,242 I'm not a throne guy. 85 00:03:15,342 --> 00:03:19,046 What I'm saying is, what have you been avoiding? 86 00:03:19,146 --> 00:03:21,014 It's time for your first Council meeting. 87 00:03:21,114 --> 00:03:24,618 All this research, it's the ammunition we need 88 00:03:24,718 --> 00:03:26,253 to get to where we're going... 89 00:03:26,353 --> 00:03:28,522 a better day for the vampire species, 90 00:03:28,622 --> 00:03:29,856 just like we planned. 91 00:03:30,023 --> 00:03:31,625 It's still a big ask. 92 00:03:31,725 --> 00:03:33,827 Maurice, you took the throne when you killed Logan. 93 00:03:33,927 --> 00:03:35,095 Whether you sit on it or not, 94 00:03:35,195 --> 00:03:37,164 you can't ignore the power you took. 95 00:03:40,334 --> 00:03:44,638 Reggie, my goal was to help save your life. 96 00:03:44,738 --> 00:03:46,540 Okay? And I did that. 97 00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:49,042 But I don't want to live my life like... 98 00:03:49,142 --> 00:03:51,612 like Logan the dust bunny, 99 00:03:51,712 --> 00:03:55,215 full of ceremonial robes and funny hats. 100 00:03:55,315 --> 00:03:57,618 That's why I'll be there with you. 101 00:03:57,718 --> 00:03:59,019 Hand to the throne. 102 00:03:59,119 --> 00:04:02,322 Again, understanding you don't actually want to sit on it. 103 00:04:02,422 --> 00:04:04,691 We can still do great things. 104 00:04:04,791 --> 00:04:06,526 But we're outsiders. 105 00:04:06,627 --> 00:04:09,162 And from what I hear, there is growing chaos 106 00:04:09,262 --> 00:04:10,597 within the vampire community, 107 00:04:10,697 --> 00:04:14,001 that the vain, shallow assholes need their deacon. 108 00:04:14,034 --> 00:04:16,570 And also, there's a smaller subset 109 00:04:16,670 --> 00:04:20,073 of rogue vampires, bloodsucking politicians, 110 00:04:20,173 --> 00:04:22,009 who want what you've won. 111 00:04:22,075 --> 00:04:24,111 [SOLEMN MUSIC] 112 00:04:24,211 --> 00:04:26,446 Then let 'em take it. 113 00:04:26,546 --> 00:04:28,348 That's not an option, in my opinion, 114 00:04:28,448 --> 00:04:30,627 and I'm pretty sure Machiavelli would back me up on that. 115 00:04:30,651 --> 00:04:33,453 [DOOR CLICKS] But yeah, text me later. 116 00:04:33,553 --> 00:04:36,423 [UPBEAT MUSIC] 117 00:04:36,523 --> 00:04:37,691 ♪ ♪ 118 00:04:37,791 --> 00:04:39,760 - Hey. - Hey. 119 00:04:39,860 --> 00:04:41,161 How have you been? 120 00:04:41,261 --> 00:04:43,263 Since yesterday? 121 00:04:43,363 --> 00:04:45,732 I mean, outside of the work environment, 122 00:04:45,832 --> 00:04:48,135 like at home, in your room. 123 00:04:48,235 --> 00:04:50,504 I was wondering, for example, uh, 124 00:04:50,604 --> 00:04:53,373 if you've been doing any thinking about things 125 00:04:53,473 --> 00:04:56,977 that you could be thinking about. 126 00:05:02,649 --> 00:05:06,153 The important thing about this time... 127 00:05:06,253 --> 00:05:08,188 the time that we gave to each other 128 00:05:08,288 --> 00:05:09,790 and the time apart... 129 00:05:09,890 --> 00:05:11,725 the important thing about that is 130 00:05:11,825 --> 00:05:13,260 that it lets me look at the world 131 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:15,395 and where I want to be in it. 132 00:05:15,495 --> 00:05:18,832 On that note, vampire travel is pretty difficult. 133 00:05:18,999 --> 00:05:22,002 The whole shipboard coffin thing isn't really an option. 134 00:05:22,069 --> 00:05:24,771 But a carefully selected series of night flights 135 00:05:24,871 --> 00:05:26,111 can get you to your destination, 136 00:05:26,173 --> 00:05:27,741 if you're traveling east. 137 00:05:27,841 --> 00:05:31,011 Wait, did you mean that in a metaphorical sense, 138 00:05:31,111 --> 00:05:33,780 or did you really book a trip? 139 00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:37,117 I ran away from a church that worshipped angels 140 00:05:37,217 --> 00:05:39,920 and ended up in the middle of a vampire war. 141 00:05:40,020 --> 00:05:42,022 I totally get it. That's on me. 142 00:05:42,089 --> 00:05:43,657 I apologize. 143 00:05:43,757 --> 00:05:45,258 I want to live on the beach. 144 00:05:45,359 --> 00:05:47,127 I want to learn how to surf. 145 00:05:47,227 --> 00:05:50,063 I want to do something other than pour slushies 146 00:05:50,163 --> 00:05:52,799 for thirsty customers. 147 00:05:52,966 --> 00:05:57,137 Maybe I'll adopt a senior dog. 148 00:05:57,237 --> 00:05:59,473 When Todd gets back from his entrepreneurial seminar 149 00:05:59,573 --> 00:06:02,609 in Topeka, I'm giving my notice. 150 00:06:02,709 --> 00:06:04,378 Two weeks. 151 00:06:04,478 --> 00:06:05,879 Oh. 152 00:06:05,979 --> 00:06:07,714 Okay. 153 00:06:07,814 --> 00:06:09,983 Major life decision. 154 00:06:10,050 --> 00:06:12,853 That's... fun. 155 00:06:12,986 --> 00:06:16,123 ♪ No, I won't do that ♪ 156 00:06:16,223 --> 00:06:19,026 She's clearly moving in the wrong direction. 157 00:06:19,126 --> 00:06:21,762 And how am I supposed to live on the beach? 158 00:06:21,862 --> 00:06:23,664 Sunshine equals death. 159 00:06:23,764 --> 00:06:25,899 ♪ And some days, it don't come easy ♪ 160 00:06:25,999 --> 00:06:27,401 I suck at the friend zone. 161 00:06:27,501 --> 00:06:29,102 ♪ And some days, it don't come hard ♪ 162 00:06:29,202 --> 00:06:31,104 ♪ Some days, it don't come at all ♪ 163 00:06:31,204 --> 00:06:35,409 ♪ And these are the days that never end ♪ 164 00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:38,545 ♪ And some nights, you breathing fire ♪ 165 00:06:38,645 --> 00:06:40,013 [SIGHS] 166 00:06:40,047 --> 00:06:43,317 ♪ And some nights, you're carved in ice ♪ 167 00:06:43,417 --> 00:06:46,119 I need a plan. 168 00:06:46,219 --> 00:06:51,792 Better still, one big gesture. 169 00:06:51,959 --> 00:06:55,829 One so big, it'll show her what she means to me 170 00:06:55,963 --> 00:06:59,499 and what I mean to her, and if those things are true, 171 00:06:59,599 --> 00:07:01,635 how can we do anything in this world 172 00:07:01,735 --> 00:07:04,838 unless it's together? 173 00:07:04,972 --> 00:07:06,306 That is so cool. 174 00:07:06,406 --> 00:07:09,710 ♪ As long as the stars are burning ♪ 175 00:07:09,810 --> 00:07:11,845 Listen to me. [VOICE ECHOES] 176 00:07:11,979 --> 00:07:13,580 It's time for you to go. 177 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:17,684 You delivered the pizza, I gave you an awesome tip, 178 00:07:17,784 --> 00:07:19,486 and you walked away. 179 00:07:19,586 --> 00:07:22,255 Oh, the bug bites on your arm will heal, 180 00:07:22,356 --> 00:07:24,358 but maybe put some Band-Aids on them. 181 00:07:26,727 --> 00:07:28,595 - [SIGHS] - ♪ No, I won't do that ♪ 182 00:07:28,695 --> 00:07:31,198 ♪ I would do anything for love ♪ 183 00:07:31,298 --> 00:07:34,067 ♪ Anything you've been dreaming of ♪ 184 00:07:34,167 --> 00:07:37,571 ♪ But I just won't do that ♪ 185 00:07:37,671 --> 00:07:41,308 One big gesture. 186 00:07:41,408 --> 00:07:43,410 ♪ Anything you've been dreaming of ♪ 187 00:07:43,510 --> 00:07:46,446 ♪ But I just won't do that ♪ 188 00:07:46,546 --> 00:07:49,416 [OMINOUS MUSIC] 189 00:07:49,516 --> 00:07:50,516 ♪ ♪ 190 00:07:50,584 --> 00:07:53,954 Reginald. I've been waiting for you. 191 00:07:53,987 --> 00:07:57,457 Uh, where am I? 192 00:07:57,557 --> 00:07:59,092 It's complicated. 193 00:07:59,192 --> 00:08:01,161 Who are you? 194 00:08:01,261 --> 00:08:04,965 It's... complicated. 195 00:08:05,032 --> 00:08:07,267 So it's complicated. 196 00:08:07,367 --> 00:08:09,970 I think I'm going to like you. 197 00:08:10,003 --> 00:08:11,805 Why am I here? 198 00:08:11,972 --> 00:08:14,274 And please don't say it's complicated. 199 00:08:14,374 --> 00:08:19,212 You are here to beg for your life, 200 00:08:19,313 --> 00:08:21,014 vampire. 201 00:08:22,883 --> 00:08:24,768 Whoa. 202 00:08:24,988 --> 00:08:27,488 - Synced and corrected by naFraC - - www.addic7ed.com - 203 00:08:30,326 --> 00:08:33,046 Okay, focus. 204 00:08:33,343 --> 00:08:37,313 Feel the power. 205 00:08:37,987 --> 00:08:39,889 [SIGHS] Not a damn thing. 206 00:08:39,989 --> 00:08:41,491 Language. 207 00:08:41,591 --> 00:08:43,102 What's the use of having a superpower 208 00:08:43,126 --> 00:08:44,594 if I can't control it? 209 00:08:44,627 --> 00:08:46,362 And where'd it come from, anyway? 210 00:08:46,462 --> 00:08:49,632 You can't be Spider-Man without a radioactive spider. 211 00:08:49,732 --> 00:08:51,568 [EXHALES] No idea. 212 00:08:51,668 --> 00:08:54,437 Oh, does your mom have any powers that you know about? 213 00:08:54,537 --> 00:08:56,439 My mom spent most of the last month in bed. 214 00:08:56,539 --> 00:08:58,541 [SIGHS] Okay, patience, all right? 215 00:08:58,641 --> 00:09:00,743 We'll get there. We just need some time. 216 00:09:00,843 --> 00:09:02,245 Yeah, you're optimistic. 217 00:09:02,345 --> 00:09:04,948 I'm an optimist by nature and necessity. 218 00:09:05,048 --> 00:09:08,952 Hope is a choice. 219 00:09:09,052 --> 00:09:11,154 What's up, big guy? I can tell. 220 00:09:11,254 --> 00:09:12,374 Do you really have to ask? 221 00:09:12,455 --> 00:09:14,190 You and Sarah are on a time-out. 222 00:09:14,290 --> 00:09:15,901 It doesn't have to be the end of the world. 223 00:09:15,925 --> 00:09:17,193 It's barely been a month. 224 00:09:17,293 --> 00:09:20,230 Yeah, sure, unless Sarah uses that month 225 00:09:20,330 --> 00:09:22,465 to charge into an uncertain future without me. 226 00:09:22,565 --> 00:09:25,468 But not to worry, I have a plan. 227 00:09:25,568 --> 00:09:27,570 I'm worried. 228 00:09:27,670 --> 00:09:30,340 One big gesture, 229 00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:32,909 one so big that she can't ignore it. 230 00:09:33,009 --> 00:09:34,477 Or maybe you could tell her 231 00:09:34,577 --> 00:09:36,145 how you're feeling like a normal person. 232 00:09:36,246 --> 00:09:37,323 When does that ever work for anyone? 233 00:09:37,347 --> 00:09:40,350 - [DOOR SLAMS] - [ELECTRICITY ZAPS] 234 00:09:40,450 --> 00:09:41,584 Dude! 235 00:09:41,618 --> 00:09:43,620 Ugh, watch where you point those things. 236 00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:46,089 [GASPS] No way. 237 00:09:46,189 --> 00:09:49,325 - You killed my toaster. - Sorry. 238 00:09:49,425 --> 00:09:51,227 Oh, hey, Angela. Nice to see you. 239 00:09:51,327 --> 00:09:53,396 - Hmm. - Why are you here? 240 00:09:53,496 --> 00:09:56,299 Mm, 'cause the Council, in its infinite lack of wisdom, 241 00:09:56,399 --> 00:09:59,135 took away my mansion due to, and I quote, 242 00:09:59,235 --> 00:10:01,371 "a new focus on fiscal responsibility" 243 00:10:01,471 --> 00:10:03,306 and just kicked me to the curb. 244 00:10:03,406 --> 00:10:04,908 Huh, well, you know, I could 245 00:10:05,008 --> 00:10:06,409 glamour you to forget your troubles. 246 00:10:06,509 --> 00:10:08,378 Yeah, Reginald can glamour other vampires 247 00:10:08,478 --> 00:10:10,880 like no other vampire can. He's special. 248 00:10:10,980 --> 00:10:12,549 Don't you even think about it. 249 00:10:12,649 --> 00:10:14,426 I thought you and Maurice killed the Council. 250 00:10:14,450 --> 00:10:16,519 We killed Logan. Most of the Council survived 251 00:10:16,619 --> 00:10:18,721 - like cockroaches over there. - Um, hi. 252 00:10:18,821 --> 00:10:20,557 Can we get back to my housing crisis? 253 00:10:20,657 --> 00:10:21,891 - Thank you. - Why don't you just 254 00:10:21,991 --> 00:10:23,426 glamour yourself a penthouse, okay? 255 00:10:23,526 --> 00:10:25,195 - What is the big deal? - [SIGHS] 256 00:10:25,295 --> 00:10:27,997 I can't glamour myself a penthouse 257 00:10:28,097 --> 00:10:30,567 because the Council issued me a temporary restraining order, 258 00:10:30,667 --> 00:10:32,769 forbidding any supernatural advancements 259 00:10:32,869 --> 00:10:34,370 as my punishment for... 260 00:10:34,470 --> 00:10:36,910 oh, and you're gonna love this 'cause it has to do with you... 261 00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:40,210 my part in the death of the previous deacon. 262 00:10:40,310 --> 00:10:41,611 I mean, how is that fair? 263 00:10:41,711 --> 00:10:43,846 And what is Maurice gonna do about it? 264 00:10:43,947 --> 00:10:47,717 Maurice isn't exactly committed 265 00:10:47,817 --> 00:10:50,753 to the deacon thing yet. 266 00:10:50,853 --> 00:10:54,123 That's my spawn, a man of principle. 267 00:10:54,224 --> 00:10:56,726 Don't worry. I'm gonna get him there, okay? 268 00:10:56,826 --> 00:10:58,161 He just needs a little push. 269 00:10:58,261 --> 00:11:01,164 All right? You good? Great. 270 00:11:01,264 --> 00:11:03,299 Now get the fuck out of my apartment. 271 00:11:03,399 --> 00:11:06,102 [GASPS] 272 00:11:06,202 --> 00:11:09,105 This last month has been 273 00:11:09,205 --> 00:11:10,974 the best month of my life. 274 00:11:11,074 --> 00:11:14,244 Mine too. [GIGGLES] 275 00:11:14,344 --> 00:11:16,488 Except for the week I was in Paris with Josephine Baker, 276 00:11:16,512 --> 00:11:18,648 but that's a secret for another time. 277 00:11:18,748 --> 00:11:20,392 I think I would like to hear that secret. 278 00:11:20,416 --> 00:11:23,853 You will, but there's a "but" coming, 279 00:11:23,953 --> 00:11:26,022 so you might as well get to it. 280 00:11:26,122 --> 00:11:27,499 You're a vampire, and I'm a human. 281 00:11:27,523 --> 00:11:29,192 - Understood. - I have a list, 282 00:11:29,292 --> 00:11:33,029 but it's probably easier if I get it out all in one. 283 00:11:33,129 --> 00:11:34,406 You're a vampire, and I'm a human. 284 00:11:34,430 --> 00:11:35,708 You'll live forever, and I won't. 285 00:11:35,732 --> 00:11:37,433 I serve slushies at the Slushy Shack, 286 00:11:37,534 --> 00:11:40,336 and you're a hired assassin who murders people. 287 00:11:40,436 --> 00:11:41,638 You're a free spirit, 288 00:11:41,704 --> 00:11:43,740 and I'm a prisoner to my own obsessions. 289 00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:45,384 You're a night person, and I love the sun. 290 00:11:45,408 --> 00:11:48,811 But the headline should probably be 291 00:11:48,912 --> 00:11:51,214 I'm a slushy jockey, 292 00:11:51,314 --> 00:11:53,583 and you're a hired assassin who murders people. 293 00:11:53,616 --> 00:11:56,452 [TENDER MUSIC] 294 00:11:56,586 --> 00:11:58,688 You know what I feel when I see you? 295 00:11:58,788 --> 00:12:04,627 ♪ ♪ 296 00:12:04,727 --> 00:12:08,031 You're like sunshine to me, 297 00:12:08,131 --> 00:12:12,068 sunshine I thought I'd never feel again. 298 00:12:12,168 --> 00:12:14,671 Your list is a good list, 299 00:12:14,771 --> 00:12:16,339 but it sounds like a window dressing, 300 00:12:16,439 --> 00:12:19,108 except for the part that's glass. 301 00:12:19,209 --> 00:12:21,277 I'm a killer-diller. 302 00:12:24,551 --> 00:12:27,320 From this moment on, I'm out of the game. 303 00:12:27,420 --> 00:12:29,589 An ex-assassin, a former killer, 304 00:12:29,689 --> 00:12:31,725 a vampire with peaceful intentions at play 305 00:12:31,825 --> 00:12:34,928 in a wide world and nothing more. 306 00:12:34,961 --> 00:12:37,764 Just like that? 307 00:12:37,931 --> 00:12:40,200 Love makes everything just like that, 308 00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:42,102 if you're really in love. 309 00:12:42,202 --> 00:12:49,309 ♪ ♪ 310 00:13:10,063 --> 00:13:12,966 [ROCK MUSIC PLAYING] 311 00:13:13,066 --> 00:13:18,171 ♪ ♪ 312 00:13:18,564 --> 00:13:20,066 Where have you been? 313 00:13:20,246 --> 00:13:24,450 Everywhere I go, I find objects that astonish me. 314 00:13:24,461 --> 00:13:26,496 It's a comb. 315 00:13:26,686 --> 00:13:28,721 We had a mission: 316 00:13:28,821 --> 00:13:31,257 Kill the vampire called Reginald 317 00:13:31,291 --> 00:13:35,061 whose very existence threatens the Great Reckoning, 318 00:13:35,161 --> 00:13:38,731 find Balestro's offspring before the end of days, 319 00:13:38,831 --> 00:13:42,902 and you failed at the first. 320 00:13:43,002 --> 00:13:45,638 We have not attempted the second. 321 00:13:45,738 --> 00:13:48,775 You have been to this realm before. 322 00:13:48,875 --> 00:13:51,211 I have not. 323 00:13:51,244 --> 00:13:54,848 Everything is strange and wonderful to me. 324 00:13:54,948 --> 00:13:58,551 Life among the living. 325 00:13:58,651 --> 00:14:00,286 I intend to stay here and prosper 326 00:14:00,386 --> 00:14:03,923 - for as long as I can. - Hear me. 327 00:14:04,023 --> 00:14:08,595 The living, these mortals, 328 00:14:08,695 --> 00:14:11,798 possess a corrupting nature. 329 00:14:13,666 --> 00:14:17,804 If you stay here, you will not prosper. 330 00:14:17,904 --> 00:14:21,307 You will lose your soul. 331 00:14:21,407 --> 00:14:22,976 [OMINOUS MUSIC] 332 00:14:23,076 --> 00:14:27,480 This is a profane enchantment. 333 00:14:27,580 --> 00:14:31,451 You are prisoner to that elixir. 334 00:14:31,551 --> 00:14:34,320 ♪ ♪ 335 00:14:34,420 --> 00:14:36,022 She feeds it to you. 336 00:14:36,122 --> 00:14:37,991 [SLURPING] 337 00:14:38,091 --> 00:14:39,792 Thanks, have a good one. 338 00:14:39,893 --> 00:14:41,561 ♪ ♪ 339 00:14:41,661 --> 00:14:44,030 You are my brother. 340 00:14:44,130 --> 00:14:46,533 I will save you from inequity. 341 00:14:46,633 --> 00:14:48,568 You have my word. 342 00:14:48,668 --> 00:14:51,237 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 343 00:14:52,494 --> 00:14:54,576 Oh, Balestro, 344 00:14:54,587 --> 00:14:57,919 my brother has lost his way. 345 00:14:57,929 --> 00:15:02,027 He has fallen for earthly pleasures. 346 00:15:02,038 --> 00:15:03,840 He is captive 347 00:15:03,940 --> 00:15:07,443 to a drink called "slushy." 348 00:15:07,543 --> 00:15:11,280 I must save him from temptation. 349 00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:15,151 I must stop those who seduce him 350 00:15:15,251 --> 00:15:18,688 with this pagan elixir. 351 00:15:18,788 --> 00:15:22,525 I must stop her. 352 00:15:22,625 --> 00:15:27,196 Please give me the strength to do what must be done. 353 00:15:27,296 --> 00:15:29,065 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 354 00:15:29,165 --> 00:15:30,700 Amen. 355 00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:32,201 ♪ ♪ 356 00:15:32,301 --> 00:15:35,204 [SENSUAL MUSIC] 357 00:15:35,304 --> 00:15:39,709 ♪ ♪ 358 00:15:39,809 --> 00:15:41,878 Please tell me you're not trying to carve 359 00:15:41,978 --> 00:15:43,679 your name in my body. 360 00:15:43,690 --> 00:15:45,725 It heals right up. 361 00:15:45,915 --> 00:15:52,789 ♪ ♪ 362 00:16:05,001 --> 00:16:08,905 I want my mansion back, 363 00:16:09,005 --> 00:16:10,540 and that seems like something 364 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:13,009 the new deacon ought to do for me. 365 00:16:13,142 --> 00:16:14,844 You talked to Reginald? 366 00:16:14,944 --> 00:16:18,147 How can you just walk away from all that power, huh? 367 00:16:18,247 --> 00:16:20,216 Would you take it? 368 00:16:20,316 --> 00:16:22,652 In a heartbeat. 369 00:16:22,752 --> 00:16:26,522 Well, I can't give it to you, no matter what I do. 370 00:16:26,622 --> 00:16:27,924 Why? 371 00:16:28,024 --> 00:16:30,993 Because there's a difference 372 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:34,163 between power and justice. 373 00:16:36,632 --> 00:16:39,035 Or did you forget? 374 00:16:39,168 --> 00:16:40,603 Hmm. 375 00:16:40,703 --> 00:16:44,674 One does come easier when the other is in hand. 376 00:16:44,774 --> 00:16:48,311 [SCOFFS] But mostly, you just want your mansion. 377 00:16:48,411 --> 00:16:50,213 I want everything. 378 00:16:50,313 --> 00:16:51,814 [BLADE SLICES] 379 00:16:51,914 --> 00:16:55,918 [BOTH MOANING] 380 00:16:56,018 --> 00:16:58,554 - Yes, you do. - [GASPS] 381 00:16:58,654 --> 00:17:01,824 [BOTH MOANING] 382 00:17:01,924 --> 00:17:05,328 Ah, yes, you do. 383 00:17:10,266 --> 00:17:12,802 "Thinkin Bout You." 384 00:17:12,902 --> 00:17:14,670 Song title. 385 00:17:14,771 --> 00:17:17,140 I know. Frank Ocean. 386 00:17:17,173 --> 00:17:19,642 Yeah. 387 00:17:19,742 --> 00:17:21,144 "Go Big or Go Home." 388 00:17:21,177 --> 00:17:23,913 - YG and Big Sean? - Yup. 389 00:17:24,013 --> 00:17:26,149 "Go big or go home." 390 00:17:28,151 --> 00:17:29,385 Thanks. 391 00:17:29,485 --> 00:17:31,654 You give me great gifts. 392 00:17:31,754 --> 00:17:36,592 I will keep you safe from harm, ever and always. 393 00:17:38,828 --> 00:17:41,931 Right. 394 00:17:42,031 --> 00:17:43,666 I heard 395 00:17:43,766 --> 00:17:46,102 there's a hero who patrols the streets of Akron at night, 396 00:17:46,202 --> 00:17:48,104 protecting the innocent. 397 00:17:48,204 --> 00:17:50,239 He's definitely something. 398 00:17:50,339 --> 00:17:53,176 I really wish I had his coat. It's sleek, stylish. 399 00:17:53,276 --> 00:17:56,813 The Keanu vibes is strong with this one. 400 00:17:56,913 --> 00:17:59,148 Mm-hmm. 401 00:17:59,248 --> 00:18:01,150 [TOY SQUEAKS] 402 00:18:01,250 --> 00:18:04,153 [INTRIGUING MUSIC] 403 00:18:04,253 --> 00:18:11,327 ♪ ♪ 404 00:18:30,179 --> 00:18:31,848 [PEN CLICKS] 405 00:18:31,948 --> 00:18:39,055 ♪ ♪ 406 00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:48,469 [RUMBLING] 407 00:18:48,881 --> 00:18:50,316 Mom. 408 00:18:50,350 --> 00:18:53,920 Mom, guess what. 409 00:18:54,020 --> 00:18:55,822 Holy shitballs. 410 00:18:55,922 --> 00:18:57,657 - Room service? - [DOG WHINING] 411 00:18:57,813 --> 00:19:00,382 - We have a puppy? - Oh, him? 412 00:19:00,393 --> 00:19:02,595 Yes, him. When did this happen? 413 00:19:02,695 --> 00:19:04,964 Would you believe me if I said just now? 414 00:19:05,064 --> 00:19:08,001 No, but it doesn't matter because we have a puppy now. 415 00:19:08,101 --> 00:19:09,135 [LAUGHS] 416 00:19:09,235 --> 00:19:10,403 - Hi. - Oh, careful. 417 00:19:10,503 --> 00:19:11,938 He's a little squirmy. 418 00:19:12,038 --> 00:19:13,773 Oh, he's adorable. 419 00:19:13,873 --> 00:19:15,642 Yes, he is. 420 00:19:18,077 --> 00:19:21,447 ♪ My name is Nikki ♪ 421 00:19:21,547 --> 00:19:24,784 ♪ Their name is Ashley ♪ 422 00:19:24,884 --> 00:19:27,453 ♪ Their voice is like an angel ♪ 423 00:19:27,553 --> 00:19:33,393 ♪ Every word they say just melts me ♪ 424 00:19:33,493 --> 00:19:36,396 [ETHEREAL WHOOSH] 425 00:19:36,496 --> 00:19:39,198 Why are you following me? 426 00:19:39,365 --> 00:19:42,568 I need your help. 427 00:19:42,669 --> 00:19:44,137 Angel. 428 00:19:44,237 --> 00:19:46,072 You know us? 429 00:19:46,172 --> 00:19:53,279 ♪ ♪ 430 00:19:56,149 --> 00:19:59,285 But you're the first one I ever met up close. 431 00:19:59,385 --> 00:20:02,922 I want you to kill another, up close. 432 00:20:03,022 --> 00:20:04,857 That sounds fun. 433 00:20:04,957 --> 00:20:07,894 Uh, but you must have me confused with somebody else. 434 00:20:07,994 --> 00:20:10,997 I know who you are and what you do. 435 00:20:11,097 --> 00:20:13,599 If you knew me, you'd know that I made a promise 436 00:20:13,700 --> 00:20:15,401 to give up that life. 437 00:20:15,501 --> 00:20:17,603 I keep my promises. 438 00:20:17,704 --> 00:20:19,372 No more killer-diller. 439 00:20:19,472 --> 00:20:21,641 She will die if Raphael lives. 440 00:20:21,741 --> 00:20:23,576 She? 441 00:20:23,676 --> 00:20:27,146 - Sarah gives me slushies. - I heard about you. 442 00:20:27,246 --> 00:20:28,815 You're the new guy at the shop. 443 00:20:28,915 --> 00:20:32,452 I am an angel, and I need your help. 444 00:20:32,552 --> 00:20:34,821 Why does this Raphael want to kill Sarah? 445 00:20:34,921 --> 00:20:37,690 - Sarah gives me slushies. - Okay. 446 00:20:37,790 --> 00:20:39,625 Why don't you kill him yourself? 447 00:20:39,726 --> 00:20:41,794 I cannot kill another of my kind. 448 00:20:41,894 --> 00:20:44,330 It is forbidden. It would be known. 449 00:20:44,430 --> 00:20:46,632 I've never killed an angel before. 450 00:20:46,733 --> 00:20:49,602 Uh, besides, with recent cost of living increases 451 00:20:49,702 --> 00:20:51,537 and subsequent price point adjustments, 452 00:20:51,637 --> 00:20:53,415 I'm not sure you can afford what it would cost 453 00:20:53,439 --> 00:20:56,109 to kill an angel. 454 00:20:56,209 --> 00:20:57,410 [BLADE RESOUNDS] 455 00:20:57,510 --> 00:21:00,513 [FLAMES WHOOSHING] 456 00:21:01,914 --> 00:21:06,919 Take my sword. Use it as you see fit. 457 00:21:07,020 --> 00:21:10,523 Maybe just this once. 458 00:21:17,730 --> 00:21:20,466 Whoa. 459 00:21:20,566 --> 00:21:23,102 - Again? - Again. 460 00:21:23,202 --> 00:21:27,540 The iconography in this dream is a little on the nose. 461 00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:29,876 Attire appropriate to the moment. 462 00:21:29,976 --> 00:21:32,812 This is where I beg for my life? 463 00:21:32,912 --> 00:21:34,480 No. 464 00:21:34,580 --> 00:21:38,017 This is when I explain why you must beg. 465 00:21:38,117 --> 00:21:40,720 Okay. I'm all ears. 466 00:21:40,820 --> 00:21:43,556 You are not a man. You are a monster. 467 00:21:43,656 --> 00:21:45,758 Blood and only blood nourishes you, 468 00:21:45,858 --> 00:21:48,661 blood taken from the innocent like lambs. 469 00:21:48,761 --> 00:21:50,630 You inhabit the night because you dare not 470 00:21:50,730 --> 00:21:53,166 expose your sins to the sun. 471 00:21:53,266 --> 00:21:55,234 You make that sound like it's such a bad thing. 472 00:21:55,368 --> 00:21:57,904 You are a parasite. 473 00:21:58,004 --> 00:22:00,573 You contribute nothing to the earthly realm 474 00:22:00,673 --> 00:22:02,775 other than your hunger. 475 00:22:02,875 --> 00:22:04,410 There's no future in you 476 00:22:04,510 --> 00:22:08,281 despite the eternity of your years. 477 00:22:08,381 --> 00:22:13,252 You are a mistake that requires correction. 478 00:22:18,925 --> 00:22:21,861 [GRUNTING] 479 00:22:21,961 --> 00:22:23,663 [SIGHS] 480 00:22:23,763 --> 00:22:25,898 Sequels are never as good as the original. 481 00:22:27,441 --> 00:22:30,825 [UPBEAT MUSIC] 482 00:22:30,836 --> 00:22:33,104 ♪ ♪ 483 00:22:33,393 --> 00:22:35,362 You really like your slushies, huh? 484 00:22:35,462 --> 00:22:36,997 It's my magic potion. 485 00:22:37,008 --> 00:22:39,277 - One a day. - [LAUGHS] 486 00:22:39,672 --> 00:22:42,241 I'm glad you brought me here. 487 00:22:43,626 --> 00:22:45,828 I'm sorry I never managed to... 488 00:22:45,839 --> 00:22:48,975 It's okay. 489 00:22:49,142 --> 00:22:50,644 [SOFT MUSIC] 490 00:22:50,744 --> 00:22:54,948 I feel like I've been in bed for a year, but I'm better. 491 00:22:55,048 --> 00:22:56,750 I need to get back to the world. 492 00:22:56,850 --> 00:23:01,321 Yeah, well, the world is a strange and wonderful place. 493 00:23:01,421 --> 00:23:02,956 Mm. 494 00:23:03,056 --> 00:23:05,192 I used to worry about that, 495 00:23:05,292 --> 00:23:09,296 how you would navigate the strange and wonderful. 496 00:23:09,396 --> 00:23:13,633 But sitting here now, eh, I'm not so worried anymore. 497 00:23:13,733 --> 00:23:16,303 Yeah, well, navigation is usually the mom's job, 498 00:23:16,403 --> 00:23:18,605 I mean, until I age up. 499 00:23:20,073 --> 00:23:23,009 Yes, it is. 500 00:23:24,778 --> 00:23:26,513 Tell me. 501 00:23:26,613 --> 00:23:27,914 Tell you what? 502 00:23:28,014 --> 00:23:31,918 Tell me all about the strange and wonderful in your world. 503 00:23:32,018 --> 00:23:33,753 I can do that. 504 00:23:33,854 --> 00:23:35,322 Sure, why not? 505 00:23:35,422 --> 00:23:38,058 And Mom, if you're looking for strange, 506 00:23:38,191 --> 00:23:40,660 trust me, I've got extra-special strange... 507 00:23:40,761 --> 00:23:43,130 [CACKLES] 508 00:23:43,196 --> 00:23:46,566 Top of the morning, me pretties. 509 00:23:46,666 --> 00:23:47,712 Top of the what now? 510 00:23:47,723 --> 00:23:49,325 I think you've got the wrong table. 511 00:23:49,336 --> 00:23:52,939 Ooh! And what are we up to? 512 00:23:53,039 --> 00:23:54,207 Mother-daughter time. 513 00:23:54,307 --> 00:23:57,544 Ah, nothing like it. 514 00:23:57,644 --> 00:24:02,682 There is no love like the love of a mother. 515 00:24:02,783 --> 00:24:04,184 Have you guys met? 516 00:24:04,284 --> 00:24:07,687 Well, I don't want to overstay my welcome. 517 00:24:07,788 --> 00:24:09,766 Yeah, well, we didn't actually welcome you, did we? 518 00:24:09,790 --> 00:24:12,058 It was a pleasure to spend 519 00:24:12,159 --> 00:24:15,061 even a small amount of time with you. 520 00:24:15,162 --> 00:24:17,597 Have a perfect day. 521 00:24:17,697 --> 00:24:20,267 [CACKLES] Ooh! 522 00:24:22,302 --> 00:24:23,470 That was weird, right? 523 00:24:23,570 --> 00:24:26,206 [CHUCKLES] Yeah, very weird. 524 00:24:26,306 --> 00:24:28,308 I feel like Snow White. 525 00:24:28,408 --> 00:24:30,043 [INTRIGUING MUSIC] 526 00:24:30,177 --> 00:24:31,178 You saw her, right? 527 00:24:31,244 --> 00:24:33,447 Like a witch out of a fairy tale? 528 00:24:33,547 --> 00:24:35,525 There's something about that old lady that wasn't right. 529 00:24:35,549 --> 00:24:37,684 Can we table discussion of the fairy-tale witch 530 00:24:37,784 --> 00:24:39,429 in order to do what we're supposed to be doing? 531 00:24:39,453 --> 00:24:41,288 "Focus. Fuel the power." 532 00:24:41,388 --> 00:24:43,123 "What's the point of having a superpower 533 00:24:43,156 --> 00:24:44,357 if I can't control it?" 534 00:24:44,458 --> 00:24:46,159 - [MURMURS MOCKINGLY] - Shut up. 535 00:24:53,313 --> 00:24:55,458 Uh, not to be that guy, 536 00:24:55,469 --> 00:24:59,673 uh, but it seems like your focus is subpar. 537 00:25:00,134 --> 00:25:01,797 What's up? 538 00:25:01,808 --> 00:25:03,210 It's my mom. 539 00:25:03,310 --> 00:25:04,678 She seems really cool. 540 00:25:04,689 --> 00:25:07,704 Yeah, she's the coolest, but I worry about her. 541 00:25:07,715 --> 00:25:09,861 - Why? - In her room at night, 542 00:25:09,872 --> 00:25:11,140 something visits. 543 00:25:11,151 --> 00:25:12,786 I don't know. Nikki smelled sulfur. 544 00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:14,988 Whoa, why didn't you tell me about this before? 545 00:25:15,155 --> 00:25:16,223 Sort of a secret. 546 00:25:16,323 --> 00:25:17,467 Anyway, you said Nikki would look after me. 547 00:25:17,491 --> 00:25:19,359 Uh, well, yeah, that was when 548 00:25:19,459 --> 00:25:20,670 I was condemned to a certain death. 549 00:25:20,694 --> 00:25:22,562 But, hey, surprise. I didn't die. 550 00:25:22,662 --> 00:25:24,498 Besides, we don't have secrets between us 551 00:25:24,598 --> 00:25:27,167 because we're basically family, or unless you forgot. 552 00:25:27,234 --> 00:25:28,268 Right, sorry. 553 00:25:28,368 --> 00:25:29,479 What was Nikki gonna do about it? 554 00:25:29,503 --> 00:25:31,171 Nikki was gonna turn me into a vampire 555 00:25:31,204 --> 00:25:32,239 so that we could fight 556 00:25:32,339 --> 00:25:33,699 whatever it is that comes at night, 557 00:25:33,740 --> 00:25:35,876 but then you broke up with her and things got messy. 558 00:25:35,976 --> 00:25:38,411 That's one word for it. [SCOFFS] 559 00:25:38,512 --> 00:25:40,714 But you don't need to turn into a vampire to fight, 560 00:25:40,814 --> 00:25:41,893 not when you have... 561 00:25:41,904 --> 00:25:43,339 Lightning in my fingers. 562 00:25:43,350 --> 00:25:46,119 Exactly. Okay? So focus. 563 00:25:48,288 --> 00:25:51,258 You got this. Focus. 564 00:25:51,358 --> 00:25:53,527 [ELECTRICITY CRACKLING] 565 00:25:53,627 --> 00:25:55,929 Concentrate. 566 00:25:56,029 --> 00:25:58,432 Feel the power. 567 00:26:00,734 --> 00:26:02,135 Oh! [CHUCKLES] 568 00:26:02,235 --> 00:26:04,337 Holy shitballs! 569 00:26:04,438 --> 00:26:07,140 - Language. - [BOTH LAUGH] 570 00:26:07,207 --> 00:26:10,143 [UPBEAT MUSIC] 571 00:26:10,210 --> 00:26:14,514 ♪ ♪ 572 00:26:14,614 --> 00:26:18,151 The thing about an RV is the freedom. 573 00:26:18,185 --> 00:26:22,022 All the open road, all the possibility. 574 00:26:22,155 --> 00:26:23,275 Is it too late to warn you 575 00:26:23,323 --> 00:26:24,467 I'll rip your hearts out of your chests 576 00:26:24,491 --> 00:26:26,159 if you act like this is funny? 577 00:26:26,226 --> 00:26:28,061 - Definitely too late. - Definitely funny. 578 00:26:28,161 --> 00:26:30,831 [SIGHS] What do you want? 579 00:26:30,931 --> 00:26:32,599 I want to show you something. 580 00:26:32,699 --> 00:26:34,167 Now? 581 00:26:34,267 --> 00:26:35,735 That's what he told me. 582 00:26:35,836 --> 00:26:37,437 It's a mystery. 583 00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:42,275 Well, it'd better be a penthouse 584 00:26:42,375 --> 00:26:44,411 with an in-home sauna. 585 00:26:44,511 --> 00:26:46,179 Isn't that what you have right here? 586 00:26:50,117 --> 00:26:53,019 [MYSTERIOUS MUSIC] 587 00:26:53,120 --> 00:26:59,860 ♪ ♪ 588 00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:03,463 [ETHEREAL WHOOSH] 589 00:27:03,563 --> 00:27:04,731 - You. - Me. 590 00:27:04,831 --> 00:27:05,999 Slushy guy. 591 00:27:06,133 --> 00:27:07,901 It is as good a name as any. 592 00:27:08,001 --> 00:27:09,136 Why are you here? 593 00:27:09,169 --> 00:27:10,604 I am watching you. 594 00:27:10,704 --> 00:27:13,306 That's creepy and possibly illegal. 595 00:27:13,406 --> 00:27:14,741 Your safety is important to me. 596 00:27:14,841 --> 00:27:16,743 Still, creepy. 597 00:27:16,843 --> 00:27:18,044 You give me slushies. 598 00:27:18,145 --> 00:27:19,346 Okay, a couple things. 599 00:27:19,446 --> 00:27:21,448 I want to know everything. 600 00:27:21,548 --> 00:27:24,417 A young woman walking alone in a city at night, 601 00:27:24,518 --> 00:27:26,987 any city in America, has reason to be 602 00:27:27,154 --> 00:27:29,623 very careful of unexpected strangers. 603 00:27:29,723 --> 00:27:31,191 Then I will go. 604 00:27:31,291 --> 00:27:36,530 Second thing, given that, and it's absolutely true, 605 00:27:36,630 --> 00:27:39,533 why do I feel so safe and secure right now? 606 00:27:39,633 --> 00:27:43,203 I will protect you from harm, ever and always. 607 00:27:43,303 --> 00:27:46,306 Right, you said that before. 608 00:27:46,406 --> 00:27:48,842 - It is the truth. - How do I know that? 609 00:27:48,942 --> 00:27:50,977 Because I cannot tell a lie. 610 00:27:51,111 --> 00:27:52,579 It is impossible for me. 611 00:27:52,679 --> 00:27:55,215 Right. 612 00:27:55,315 --> 00:27:57,784 Well, I'm... I'm gonna get going. 613 00:27:57,884 --> 00:28:01,321 Um, head on home by myself. 614 00:28:01,421 --> 00:28:03,523 Thanks for whatever this was. 615 00:28:03,623 --> 00:28:05,559 [LAUGHS] 616 00:28:05,659 --> 00:28:07,961 Goodbye. 617 00:28:09,329 --> 00:28:11,431 [ETHEREAL WHOOSH] 618 00:28:11,531 --> 00:28:18,438 ♪ ♪ 619 00:28:25,169 --> 00:28:27,605 Everybody wants me to sit on the throne, 620 00:28:27,705 --> 00:28:30,575 be the deacon I'm supposed to be. 621 00:28:30,586 --> 00:28:31,963 - What is happening here? - I don't know. 622 00:28:31,987 --> 00:28:33,467 He's showing me like he's showing you. 623 00:28:33,522 --> 00:28:34,656 Look, I get that. 624 00:28:34,756 --> 00:28:37,860 You both make very convincing arguments, 625 00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:39,604 though Angela's is primarily self-interest. 626 00:28:39,628 --> 00:28:41,096 Ooh, fair point. 627 00:28:41,196 --> 00:28:44,066 Reginald, yours isn't without self-interest of your own. 628 00:28:44,166 --> 00:28:46,568 I want what's best for the vampire species. 629 00:28:46,668 --> 00:28:48,704 And I want to not live in a fucking RV. 630 00:28:48,804 --> 00:28:50,124 Nobody ever asks me what I want. 631 00:28:50,205 --> 00:28:52,007 Hey, hey, hey, check it out. Check it out. 632 00:28:52,107 --> 00:28:54,610 Listen. 633 00:28:54,710 --> 00:28:57,613 - Hey, that's a nice phone. - [CHUCKLES] 634 00:28:57,713 --> 00:28:59,615 Don't be scared. I don't bite. 635 00:28:59,715 --> 00:29:01,783 - Give me your fucking phone. - What's up? 636 00:29:01,884 --> 00:29:03,152 Hey. 637 00:29:03,252 --> 00:29:05,320 [CHUCKLES] 638 00:29:05,487 --> 00:29:07,523 [BOTH GRUNT] 639 00:29:09,925 --> 00:29:14,696 Hey, if I were you, I'd run before these two get up. 640 00:29:18,333 --> 00:29:21,303 That was unexpected. 641 00:29:21,403 --> 00:29:23,138 Wow, you rescued a phone. 642 00:29:23,238 --> 00:29:25,607 But why? 643 00:29:25,707 --> 00:29:28,210 I've been wandering the streets at night, 644 00:29:28,310 --> 00:29:29,912 helping people. 645 00:29:30,012 --> 00:29:33,382 Look, when I help them, no matter how small it is, 646 00:29:33,515 --> 00:29:38,086 the scope of it, it feels good. 647 00:29:38,187 --> 00:29:41,356 And look, I know it's not changing the vampire species 648 00:29:41,523 --> 00:29:44,126 or sitting on the throne, 649 00:29:44,226 --> 00:29:47,196 but it feels like justice, 650 00:29:47,296 --> 00:29:48,831 one night at a time. 651 00:29:48,931 --> 00:29:53,435 ♪ ♪ 652 00:29:54,595 --> 00:29:57,340 Oh, here's something you guys didn't know. 653 00:29:57,631 --> 00:29:59,953 Someone's been reading in their spare time again. 654 00:29:59,964 --> 00:30:01,964 Well, wouldn't you? It's the best thing about me. 655 00:30:01,975 --> 00:30:04,711 How much and how fast. My comprehension is perfect. 656 00:30:04,818 --> 00:30:06,753 Well, let's hope it's interesting. 657 00:30:06,854 --> 00:30:08,522 Well, it's impossible. 658 00:30:08,622 --> 00:30:11,225 See, there's a park ranger in Shenandoah National Park 659 00:30:11,236 --> 00:30:13,204 that got struck by lightning in 1942. 660 00:30:13,304 --> 00:30:16,141 Seems pretty possible. 661 00:30:16,243 --> 00:30:17,677 Well, it was the first time. 662 00:30:17,778 --> 00:30:20,313 See, this guy got struck by lightning six times, 663 00:30:20,414 --> 00:30:22,682 uh, the last one being in 1977. 664 00:30:22,783 --> 00:30:26,720 So world record. You know, human lightning rod. 665 00:30:26,820 --> 00:30:29,489 Any reason he doesn't just stay out of the rain? 666 00:30:29,589 --> 00:30:32,125 And what are the odds of this happening, you ask? 667 00:30:32,225 --> 00:30:33,493 Didn't ask. 668 00:30:33,593 --> 00:30:37,397 It's 4.15 in 1 with 33 zeros after it. 669 00:30:37,497 --> 00:30:40,033 Reginald, you are wise in the ways of the world. 670 00:30:40,133 --> 00:30:42,502 What can I say? 671 00:30:42,602 --> 00:30:45,739 Hey, you. 672 00:30:45,839 --> 00:30:47,541 How may I help you? 673 00:30:47,641 --> 00:30:50,110 I would like a Pineapple Surprise. 674 00:30:50,210 --> 00:30:52,312 Got it. That's the fave. 675 00:30:52,446 --> 00:30:54,514 You are wise in the ways of the world. 676 00:30:54,614 --> 00:30:56,750 That's what they say on the streets. 677 00:30:56,850 --> 00:30:58,318 Is there a particular street 678 00:30:58,452 --> 00:31:00,454 in which this word is made manifest? 679 00:31:00,487 --> 00:31:02,289 [MYSTERIOUS MUSIC] 680 00:31:02,456 --> 00:31:04,991 It's just an expression. 681 00:31:05,092 --> 00:31:08,895 There is still so much I need to learn. 682 00:31:08,995 --> 00:31:11,965 Where do you come from, anyway? 683 00:31:12,065 --> 00:31:14,768 The... roof? 684 00:31:14,868 --> 00:31:17,704 Here you go, one Pineapple Surprise. 685 00:31:17,804 --> 00:31:20,607 ♪ ♪ 686 00:31:20,707 --> 00:31:22,776 Thanks. 687 00:31:22,876 --> 00:31:27,681 ♪ ♪ 688 00:31:27,870 --> 00:31:30,673 There it is again. Safe and secure. 689 00:31:30,684 --> 00:31:33,220 I've really got to get myself into that cult. 690 00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:35,355 Last call, I'm out. 691 00:31:35,489 --> 00:31:39,226 See ya. Farewell. Goodbye. 692 00:31:39,326 --> 00:31:41,428 So you're leaving. 693 00:31:43,029 --> 00:31:45,932 [INTRIGUING MUSIC] 694 00:31:46,032 --> 00:31:53,140 ♪ ♪ 695 00:31:55,042 --> 00:32:00,213 Okay, who's your buddy? 696 00:32:00,313 --> 00:32:07,454 ♪ ♪ 697 00:32:09,923 --> 00:32:12,826 [OMINOUS MUSIC] 698 00:32:12,926 --> 00:32:18,799 ♪ ♪ 699 00:32:18,899 --> 00:32:21,768 [LOCKER DOOR CLANKS] 700 00:32:21,868 --> 00:32:28,709 ♪ ♪ 701 00:32:28,809 --> 00:32:31,712 [FLAMES WHOOSHING] 702 00:32:31,812 --> 00:32:38,552 ♪ ♪ 703 00:32:38,652 --> 00:32:39,986 Hi. 704 00:32:40,087 --> 00:32:41,288 You are not her. 705 00:32:41,421 --> 00:32:44,958 No, I'm something way worse. 706 00:32:45,058 --> 00:32:47,728 I do not want to kill you. 707 00:32:47,828 --> 00:32:49,663 It is not necessary. 708 00:32:49,763 --> 00:32:52,466 Run for your life, and you may keep it. 709 00:32:52,566 --> 00:32:55,068 [TUTS] You know what? 710 00:32:55,168 --> 00:32:56,203 I think I'll stay. 711 00:32:56,303 --> 00:32:58,238 [FLAMES WHOOSHING] 712 00:32:58,338 --> 00:33:01,007 ♪ ♪ 713 00:33:01,108 --> 00:33:04,211 [BOTH GRUNTING] 714 00:33:04,311 --> 00:33:07,214 [SWORDS CLANGING] 715 00:33:07,314 --> 00:33:14,454 ♪ ♪ 716 00:33:38,223 --> 00:33:42,193 Oh, Nikki, what have you done? 717 00:33:42,204 --> 00:33:43,939 [SOMBER MUSIC] 718 00:33:44,293 --> 00:33:46,028 You can't see this. 719 00:33:46,039 --> 00:33:49,375 But I did. 720 00:33:49,565 --> 00:33:52,535 - Listen... - Don't you dare! 721 00:33:52,635 --> 00:33:58,374 ♪ ♪ 722 00:34:00,943 --> 00:34:04,781 Banker, nun, third time's a... 723 00:34:04,814 --> 00:34:06,783 Charm. 724 00:34:06,883 --> 00:34:08,851 You're dressed like my dad at Sunset Beach. 725 00:34:08,951 --> 00:34:12,188 A good man who deserves better. 726 00:34:12,288 --> 00:34:14,791 Beg. 727 00:34:14,891 --> 00:34:19,028 I didn't ask for this, but it's what I got. 728 00:34:19,128 --> 00:34:23,332 It was horrible at first, as bad as you say it is, 729 00:34:23,433 --> 00:34:27,270 but I discovered I didn't have to be the sum of my fears. 730 00:34:27,370 --> 00:34:29,705 I could live like this. 731 00:34:29,806 --> 00:34:32,208 I could be a friend. 732 00:34:32,308 --> 00:34:35,311 I could fall in love. 733 00:34:35,411 --> 00:34:38,214 And I know this sounds crazy, but I could be a better man 734 00:34:38,314 --> 00:34:40,750 than I was before, 735 00:34:40,850 --> 00:34:43,486 but that doesn't take away the hunger. 736 00:34:43,586 --> 00:34:48,057 It doesn't take away my need for blood, but... 737 00:34:48,157 --> 00:34:52,762 it only makes me a monster if I act like one. 738 00:34:52,829 --> 00:34:56,866 I have a chance to help others do what I did, 739 00:34:56,966 --> 00:35:01,070 to be better than the sins that you described. 740 00:35:01,170 --> 00:35:06,375 And maybe we'll never walk in the sun... 741 00:35:08,111 --> 00:35:09,588 But that doesn't mean we don't deserve 742 00:35:09,612 --> 00:35:11,547 to walk in a better light. 743 00:35:11,647 --> 00:35:13,382 I was right. 744 00:35:13,483 --> 00:35:16,119 I like you, Reginald. 745 00:35:16,219 --> 00:35:18,454 You are not what I expected. 746 00:35:20,456 --> 00:35:24,460 And that makes your fate a sorrow to me, 747 00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:27,797 but not so much as to change what I must do. 748 00:35:31,267 --> 00:35:33,803 [GROANS] 749 00:35:33,903 --> 00:35:37,273 Okay, when you say "my fate," 750 00:35:37,373 --> 00:35:39,909 what exactly do you have in mind? 751 00:35:41,770 --> 00:35:43,626 Reginald, we gotta open soon. 752 00:35:43,637 --> 00:35:46,172 Ashley can handle it. Okay, right this way. 753 00:35:46,184 --> 00:35:47,519 Oh, there's a door there. 754 00:35:47,530 --> 00:35:48,564 - Yeah. - Uh-huh. 755 00:35:48,575 --> 00:35:50,177 Is this blindfold really necessary? 756 00:35:50,189 --> 00:35:52,758 The art of surprise depends on surprise. 757 00:35:53,061 --> 00:35:55,997 - Great. - We're almost there. Okay. 758 00:35:56,025 --> 00:35:58,027 Right there. 759 00:35:58,038 --> 00:35:59,339 Okay, you ready? 760 00:35:59,528 --> 00:36:02,031 - As ready as I'm gonna be. - Okay. 761 00:36:02,131 --> 00:36:05,334 Are you sure whatever this is is a good... 762 00:36:10,005 --> 00:36:12,074 Oh, Reginald. 763 00:36:12,174 --> 00:36:15,778 Look, it's go big or go home, right? 764 00:36:15,878 --> 00:36:19,648 Um, and I understand the value of addressing your own needs 765 00:36:19,748 --> 00:36:20,883 before the needs of others. 766 00:36:21,016 --> 00:36:23,886 - Uh-huh? - But in the end, 767 00:36:24,019 --> 00:36:27,790 there is nothing more important than love. 768 00:36:27,890 --> 00:36:30,159 Okay? Love conquers all. 769 00:36:30,259 --> 00:36:33,495 Love is all around us. It's in the air. 770 00:36:33,595 --> 00:36:36,365 It's... "I love you" 771 00:36:36,465 --> 00:36:39,969 begins with "I" and ends with "you." 772 00:36:40,035 --> 00:36:44,139 So this is about love? 773 00:36:44,239 --> 00:36:45,874 [MEAT LOAF'S "I'D DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE"] 774 00:36:45,975 --> 00:36:49,478 [FEEDBACK WHINES] 775 00:36:49,578 --> 00:36:51,413 ♪ ♪ 776 00:36:51,513 --> 00:36:53,983 [SINGING OFFKEY] ♪ And I would do ♪ 777 00:36:54,016 --> 00:36:57,620 ♪ Anything for love ♪ 778 00:36:57,720 --> 00:37:00,990 ♪ I'd run right into hell and back ♪ 779 00:37:01,023 --> 00:37:03,192 ♪ ♪ 780 00:37:03,292 --> 00:37:08,163 ♪ I would do anything for love ♪ 781 00:37:08,263 --> 00:37:10,532 ♪ But I won't do that ♪ 782 00:37:10,633 --> 00:37:13,168 ♪ ♪ 783 00:37:13,268 --> 00:37:15,871 ♪ I won't do that ♪ 784 00:37:16,005 --> 00:37:17,406 ♪ ♪ 785 00:37:17,506 --> 00:37:20,142 Mm. 786 00:37:20,242 --> 00:37:24,046 Oh, oh. [CHUCKLES] 787 00:37:24,146 --> 00:37:26,682 Oh, shit. Oh, God. 788 00:37:26,782 --> 00:37:29,718 - Oh. - Oh, oh, oh, shoot. 789 00:37:29,818 --> 00:37:31,820 - Fire! - Oh. 790 00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:35,024 [ALARM BLARING] 791 00:37:40,062 --> 00:37:42,831 [BOTH COUGHING] 792 00:37:43,177 --> 00:37:44,979 So... 793 00:37:45,079 --> 00:37:48,482 not what I was expecting, but, uh... 794 00:37:48,493 --> 00:37:50,829 but it sure gets the day started, am I right? 795 00:37:51,485 --> 00:37:54,722 [SIGHS] 796 00:37:54,733 --> 00:37:56,379 We need to have a talk. 797 00:37:56,390 --> 00:37:59,260 [GENTLE MUSIC] 798 00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:04,832 ♪ ♪ 799 00:38:04,932 --> 00:38:09,603 I guess we have to talk out loud sooner or later. 800 00:38:09,792 --> 00:38:11,494 I mean, I could sit here for days 801 00:38:11,505 --> 00:38:13,474 and happily avoid actual conversation, but... 802 00:38:13,574 --> 00:38:18,212 Sometimes, I just think talk doesn't get us anywhere. 803 00:38:18,279 --> 00:38:19,489 That's just 'cause I didn't listen. 804 00:38:19,513 --> 00:38:22,917 Just offering that perspective. 805 00:38:23,017 --> 00:38:25,219 You're right, Reginald. 806 00:38:25,319 --> 00:38:28,822 I needed time, but I didn't get it. 807 00:38:31,025 --> 00:38:33,227 I'm not unaware 808 00:38:33,260 --> 00:38:35,696 of all the good things that there are about us, 809 00:38:35,796 --> 00:38:39,500 but I need time to figure out my life, 810 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:43,204 and that's hard to do inside all of this chaos, 811 00:38:43,304 --> 00:38:45,539 the chaos of your emotions 812 00:38:45,639 --> 00:38:48,342 and the chaos of you being a vampire. 813 00:38:48,442 --> 00:38:51,178 It's a relationship obstacle. I see that now. 814 00:38:51,212 --> 00:38:53,781 It's just too much. 815 00:38:53,881 --> 00:38:57,585 [SIGHS] 816 00:38:57,685 --> 00:39:00,187 Can we be friends? 817 00:39:00,254 --> 00:39:02,389 Like, no expectations, 818 00:39:02,489 --> 00:39:05,659 no time limit on what happens next. 819 00:39:05,759 --> 00:39:08,762 'Cause I think that I really need that. 820 00:39:08,863 --> 00:39:12,466 ♪ ♪ 821 00:39:12,566 --> 00:39:14,502 [SIGHS] 822 00:39:16,570 --> 00:39:17,771 Friends. 823 00:39:22,676 --> 00:39:24,478 [SIGHS] 824 00:39:27,848 --> 00:39:32,319 On the one hand, it sucks. 825 00:39:34,355 --> 00:39:38,292 But on the other, I... 826 00:39:40,060 --> 00:39:43,531 I think I can learn to do that. 827 00:39:43,631 --> 00:39:45,533 Be that. 828 00:39:48,169 --> 00:39:50,371 You're totally lying right now. 829 00:39:50,471 --> 00:39:52,306 I can always tell. 830 00:39:52,406 --> 00:39:54,375 Well, I can't completely change my disposition 831 00:39:54,475 --> 00:39:58,812 in an hour, even with all of my accelerated abilities, 832 00:39:58,913 --> 00:40:02,716 but I... I will change. 833 00:40:02,816 --> 00:40:04,618 I promise. 834 00:40:07,154 --> 00:40:08,789 Okay. 835 00:40:08,889 --> 00:40:13,527 ♪ ♪ 836 00:40:13,627 --> 00:40:16,697 Been looking for you. 837 00:40:16,797 --> 00:40:19,033 I've been having these weird dreams 838 00:40:19,133 --> 00:40:23,137 that don't feel like dreams. 839 00:40:23,237 --> 00:40:25,005 So not the lucid kind? 840 00:40:25,105 --> 00:40:27,842 No. Different. 841 00:40:27,942 --> 00:40:29,677 Worse. 842 00:40:29,777 --> 00:40:31,879 I don't know, it's like "Night Court" for vampires, 843 00:40:31,979 --> 00:40:33,914 and I'm the one on trial. 844 00:40:34,014 --> 00:40:35,349 That is a weird dream. 845 00:40:35,449 --> 00:40:36,760 I need to shift my focus to something 846 00:40:36,784 --> 00:40:38,786 that doesn't blow up in my face. 847 00:40:38,886 --> 00:40:42,122 Changing the vampire species into something good. 848 00:40:42,223 --> 00:40:43,891 We can do that. 849 00:40:43,991 --> 00:40:47,228 And I know you don't want to, and I get that, 850 00:40:47,328 --> 00:40:49,497 but I don't think we were wrong to hope 851 00:40:49,597 --> 00:40:51,932 that there's a better way for us to live in this world. 852 00:40:52,032 --> 00:40:55,035 And just for the record, I really need something 853 00:40:55,135 --> 00:40:56,504 to get my mind off of Sarah, 854 00:40:56,604 --> 00:40:58,305 and this just might be the thing, okay? 855 00:40:58,405 --> 00:40:59,974 And besides, we're not parasites. 856 00:41:00,074 --> 00:41:03,611 All right, all right, Reggie. Look, I'll do it. 857 00:41:03,711 --> 00:41:06,013 Okay? I'll sit on the throne. 858 00:41:06,113 --> 00:41:08,249 I'll wear the deacon robes. 859 00:41:08,282 --> 00:41:10,084 I'm not sure about the big hat, though. 860 00:41:10,251 --> 00:41:13,521 Dude, this is awesome news. 861 00:41:13,621 --> 00:41:16,123 But it doesn't mean I'm not out there at night, 862 00:41:16,257 --> 00:41:18,893 - doing what I did. - Look, I get it. 863 00:41:18,993 --> 00:41:21,262 Bruce Wayne during the day, Batman in the dark. 864 00:41:21,295 --> 00:41:22,463 It's a thing. 865 00:41:22,563 --> 00:41:24,265 Yeah, except it's real. 866 00:41:24,365 --> 00:41:26,133 You get that, right? 867 00:41:26,267 --> 00:41:28,502 We don't live in any comic book. 868 00:41:28,602 --> 00:41:31,839 Yeah, well, after today, 869 00:41:31,939 --> 00:41:34,308 I would gladly accept the comic book option 870 00:41:34,408 --> 00:41:37,411 if it was available to me. 871 00:41:37,511 --> 00:41:41,348 All right, let's do this. 872 00:41:41,448 --> 00:41:44,318 Let's make a better world for the vampire nation. 873 00:41:44,418 --> 00:41:46,487 Together, you and me. 874 00:41:46,587 --> 00:41:49,223 [UPLIFTING MUSIC] 875 00:41:49,323 --> 00:41:52,226 [SIGHS] 876 00:41:52,259 --> 00:41:54,562 [OMINOUS MUSIC] 877 00:41:54,662 --> 00:41:57,631 You are a parasite. 878 00:41:57,731 --> 00:42:00,067 You contribute nothing to the earthly realm 879 00:42:00,234 --> 00:42:02,136 other than your hunger. 880 00:42:02,236 --> 00:42:03,571 There is no future in you 881 00:42:03,671 --> 00:42:07,107 despite the eternity of your years. 882 00:42:07,241 --> 00:42:12,246 You are a mistake that requires correction. 883 00:42:12,279 --> 00:42:15,249 Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's... ? 884 00:42:15,316 --> 00:42:17,284 [SCREAMING] 885 00:42:17,384 --> 00:42:18,786 Oh, my God! 886 00:42:18,886 --> 00:42:21,856 [PANTING] 887 00:42:21,956 --> 00:42:24,258 [TENSE MUSIC] 888 00:42:24,325 --> 00:42:26,627 What the fuck? 889 00:42:27,528 --> 00:42:30,431 ♪ Open your eyes up, take a breath ♪ 890 00:42:30,531 --> 00:42:33,267 ♪ Hear the sound ♪ 891 00:42:33,334 --> 00:42:35,870 [SOFT POP MUSIC] 892 00:42:35,970 --> 00:42:41,342 ♪ Come one, come all to the greatest show in town ♪ 893 00:42:41,442 --> 00:42:43,744 ♪ ♪ 894 00:42:43,844 --> 00:42:46,881 ♪ Welcome to the end of the world ♪ 895 00:42:46,981 --> 00:42:50,017 ♪ The end of the world ♪ 896 00:42:50,117 --> 00:42:53,387 ♪ Welcome to the end of the world ♪ 897 00:42:53,487 --> 00:42:55,890 ♪ The end of the world ♪